Are you a Role Model?

As a regular reader to our blog, you know that we take diversity and inclusion seriously. Diversity is our strength! Being Inclusive means being open and appreciative of others’ backgrounds, views and beliefs.

In many areas of working life, diversity and inclusion is an afterthought, so much so that in a lot of industries the cultural and gender mix in companies is in decline. We know from many places that diversity in companies helps the bottom line. If you reflect the mix of your customer base, you are more likely to be able to service their needs because you are more likely to know what those needs are!

Seema Bennett is a lady that is helping companies understand how to update their working practices to make them more inclusive. She is the Business Development Director at Everywoman, who champions the advancement of women. They work with companies, large and small, to help them retain and develop their female staff into senior leadership positions. They have an extensive training and development program and network that you can tap into as and when you need it.

Seema is very well placed to take up the baton. She trained as a Molecular Biologist and has spent much of her career working with and managing scientists and engineers. As many can appreciate, that has meant that she has spent much of her career as the only woman in a room full of men. She is a role model that we look to when asking young women to get more involved in the STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics) subjects. And role models are what young women need. They need to see their likeness (whatever they determine that to be) in places that they want to go. If you feel you can be a role model, Everywoman has a program you can become part of, you can become a Modern Muse. Like Seema!

And what a role model she is.

She is a lovely lady who can put you at your ease quickly. She chats easily and has an array of great anecdotes to keep you interested and amused. But behind that friendly face, you know is steely determination. She is certainly someone I would like to have on my side when looking for advice and mentorship. A woman after our hearts at Tech Talkfest, she shares her knowledge freely and is happy to introduce you to others who can help. You can see why we think she’s great!

You will get the opportunity to meet her at the Everywoman’s Advancing in Technology Forum on 17th March.

If you want an icebreaker, you can ask her about her book, Hiking Around Beijing that she wrote with Nicky Mason and Huilin Pinnegar. I haven’t had a chance to ask her about it yet, it is on my list….

Think about what you can do to be the role model you want to be.

Ghilaine

@LadyGhilaine

ABC of Networking

I have broken down some networking tips into some easy to remember parts. I hope it helps. I want to follow up with some other handy tips on what to talk about and how best to move around a room, not getting stuck too long in one conversation. I hope you enjoy!

Ask Questions

Have you ever been stuck with someone who talks about a subject that you are not interested in or they are already deep in conversation with someone already. The best way to start get into conversation is to ask questions. If nothing else, you will learn something. When was the last time you felt good about someone, was it the person who was interested in what you had to say? Ta Da! It was the questions that showed you they were interested.

Be Nice

This sounds a bit silly, but if you dismiss what someone says or tell them they are wrong 2 minutes after you have met them, how do you think they will feel about you after that encounter. A quote I love (which I can’t reference)

“Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always”

This helps me think about my daily interactions. Life is tough, you are having a bad day, so, maybe, is someone else. What makes you special in this regard? Nothing. Remember that sometimes, just a kind word can change someone’s day and, more importantly, mood.

Concentrate on what they have to say

Or another way to say this, is Listen (but that wouldn’t fit into my alphabet!). Don’t look across the room at other people or see who else is around. Really listen and take in what the person is saying. I tend to write things down and it helps me concentrate on what is being said, but sometimes this may not be appropriate. By going back to asking questions, you can clarify what they are saying and by repeating some of what they have said in your own words means it is more easily retained in the memory. By listening, you can watch their face and see how they feel about the subjects they are talking about. Again, their face then becomes memorable too.

Don’t interrupt

This goes back to being a listener and being nice. Whilst others are talking, many people are thinking about what they are going to say and get so excited, they talk over someone else. We teach our children not to interrupt when adults are talking as they sit there minute after minute waiting for a space. What this teaches them is to wait for someone to take a breath and get started as soon as there is a space. Be more considered with your responses. Wait until there is a gap in conversation. If there isn’t one, perhaps you won’t get to hold court today. But another day, you may get your spotlight. Often the most quiet person is seen as enigmatic, so once you have spoken people may think you are the wisest in the room. Or in my case, maybe not!

Exchange details

This isn’t necessary, but for me, meeting new people should always be about seeing how you can help them, by connecting them to someone else or by passing on a little knowledge that could be useful. If you don’t exchange details, you won’t be able to help them properly and your offers will sound and be empty promises. Some people may not want to pass their details to you, so don’t sweat it if you don’t.

Follow up with them afterwards

I am not sure if there is etiquette on this, but if someone has given me their business card, I think it is only courteous to follow up with a message. This can only be done if you have exchanged details. It allows you to follow up with your offer of help or ask any questions that you may have missed when talking with them. As networking is seen as the most basic form of business development, how can you build a good business relationship if you only contact them out of the blue 2 years after you met? This is where LinkedIn comes into its own. By doing the above, I have managed to have some really interesting conversations with people who know a lot about their specialist subjects. I have learned so much and to me that is the sign of a good day! Hope yours is good too. Ghilaine @LadyGhilaine

How do you know you are in the right place?

You have turned up and found a group of people that you think are like you. How do you know you have met those of like mind? This is a question I often struggle with.

It can sound more difficult that actually is. People are often suspicious of ulterior motives that they project onto me. What does she want back if she is offering help? Is she slightly crazy? So what do you look for when finding your community.

1. I often think the first step is how they greet you.
Does it feel comfortable. Does it mirror how you greet those you already know and admire. If you have just entered the room, does everyone have a look on their face that mirrors how you feel? For me that is a smile. But for someone like my brother it will be a scrutinising look.

2. If you are not sure, just sit and watch, this is the best way to get a feel for the people around you. 
When it comes to connections, the best way is to go back to the basics and exercise your instinct.  More often than not, the human animal is very good at reading body language and voice intonation. You can get a feel for open or closed conversations.

3. As always it pays to listen.
If you are meeting 1:1, this is an important rule. Finding out about someone is the first way to identify if you have anything in common. To ensure the conversation flows it is important to find the commonality, but if you want to know if these are people you want to see again and again, the commonality needs to be something you want to enjoy not for example, that you both found off milk in the fridge this morning.

4. Finally, be yourself!
If you want to find the group that is right for you, there is no point trying to fit in, you need to be you and identify that they fit with you and you fit with them.

Go on, go outside and see if you can find your community! In January, we hope that we can help you. We will start our new program of Tech Talkfest events, watch out for the subjects that interest you most!

Ghilaine

@LadyGhilaine

What are you missing?

Spending so much time in London, I am surrounded by people, but mostly, I don’t get to know any of them unless I have arranged to specifically meet them. Is this a missed opportunity? James Eder of the beans group has answered this question by setting up @FriendlyFriday.

In London it is hard to start a conversation with a random stranger. It tends to mark you out as a tourist or a bit strange. Sometimes though, a well-placed question because of a mis-heard announcement or a flippant comment can open up a relationship that may surprise you.

I have had another great week, meeting amazing people. These were not random, I was recommended to meet them by amazing people, the luxury of Tech Talkfest! Listen to those around you, are you missing out on meeting great people?

I met Tom Butterworth, who is helping great start-ups with funding at Silicon Valley Bank (SVB). He focusses on giving great service to all his customers, the main value of SVB, big or small, they treat you well. He was explaining to me how the traditional banking sector doesn’t understand this amazing technical explosion we are seeing so doesn’t lend money to these businesses. He has a passion for helping out those that can’t get funding through the traditional SME business channels.

Simon Wax at Buzzacotts is working hard to help those in the technical world understand what has been made available by the government to make the UK a country of Innovation. He really enjoys working with creative people and helping them grow their business with all his expertise. Some people just don’t like numbers, Simon helps them by taking away that pain, providing them with the tools to maximise their finances and strengthen their business.

The Gherkin

I had the pleasure and fortune to meet Oliver Werneyer, from Swiss Re, at the top of the Gherkin, what a view!! He is not someone who I would have bumped into in my normal activities. But because of the great connections of our members and partners, I got to meet him at one of the best places in London. We marvelled at the view and how higgledy piggled London is. It made my week!

So what are we missing? Sometimes we need to take a look at the bigger picture. Take a view from high up and look down. Are we doing the things that engage us, grow us, challenge us? Who do we not meet because we are looking down and keeping busy?

I am not suggesting that you start randomly talking to strangers on the tube, the looks of disapproval may put you off. But how about you chat with someone in the queue for coffee or lunch? Alternatively, ask someone at work to introduce you to someone interesting, once you have chatted with them, ask them the same question. You never know where it may lead……..

Have a great weekend!